Hey, everyone! I’m baaaacckkkkk! Did ya miss me?
You probably all know this anyway, but I climbed Kilimanjaro! The trek started on October 14 and I reached the summit at 0745 hrs Tanzanian time on October 19. It was an overwhelming experience, extremely tough, but very rewarding too. So proud to have made the summit, and I made lots of great friends in the other trekkers in the group. My birthday was October 20, and the Tanzanian cooks even managed to make me a birthday cake on the mountain. They brought it into the mess tent, singing to me in Swahili, and my fellow trekkers and I indulged in birthday cake for breakfast before our final descent to the base of the mountain.
Anyway, I missed Snippetting while I was away, but I have more from Ash and Sean this week as they plan their own Kilimanjaro climb. The last snippet, two weeks ago, saw Ash inadvertently giving Sean the wrong impression about himself when he said he was divorced. Now he tries to set things straight (or not!) This one is slightly longer than normal (just because I missed you all for 2 weeks, and I didn’t want to cut this scene in half). Sean is down in the mouth and Ash is anxious he might have changed his mind about them spending another couple of days hiking together after the official Wales training weekend.
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“If you changed your mind, it doesn’t matter.” My heart banged against my ribs as I hoped he wouldn’t say he didn’t want to after all. Maybe it had something to do with that weird moment on top of Snowdon when he seemed to assume from what I said, or didn’t say, that I couldn’t possibly like him like that.
“I haven’t. For a minute back there, I just thought… hoped… never mind. I’m stupid sometimes. Always like the straight guys.” He laughed, gulped the remains of the coffee in his mug, and made a face. “Ugh, it’s gone cold.”
“Are you saying you like me? Or would, if I was, um…?”
“Just forget I said anything. I’m sorry. I don’t want to make things awkward.”
“They’re not awkward. Yet.” I threaded my fingers together in a complicated knot on the table, staring at the tangle as if it were the most fascinating thing I’d ever seen. I was useless at saying what I meant when it came to feelings. Helen had always told me that was one of my worst faults. “I didn’t say I wasn’t, um, couldn’t be, um…” I cleared my throat, hoping the heat in my face wasn’t as obvious as it felt. For fuck’s sake; thirty-seven years old and I couldn’t say what I meant. Then again, I’d never been in this position before. Not with a man. Just say it.
“I’ve been with men,” I whispered.
I glanced up at Sean, finding his mouth hanging open. Clearly, he’d heard me, and was saying “what” because he couldn’t believe it.
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Don’t forget to check out the Rainbow Snippets Group for lots more great LGBT+ snippets.